Beautiful Newcastle CC

Greetings all, I am writing this having returned from a freezing Racecourse Ground in Durham where I have been watching Durham murder the Uni boys.

Always a pleasure to get outside and acclimatize to conditions in view of our first friendly of the season this coming weekend. Having now been out, I can't help but feel that the arranging of this fixture was a stupid stupid error from an over keen cricket badger. The sanctity of indoor nets was reached afterwards and I made myself feel better by bossing everyone around and then having all our quick bowlers bounce the living daylights out of an insolent youth. (That'll teach him to try and question my authority, stupid boy.)

Thoughts turned to the forthcoming fixture with a measure of excitement and preparation. Snoods have been ordered, an elder statesman talked of fielding in a balaclava. And then the realization of the situation truly struck me. About 70% of my side don't come to nets (family commitments etc blah blah) and I had no idea what my side was going to be. Thus began a phone odyssey. The first guy I spoke to was our top batter from last year, Chris Smith. Phone call was fairly short as he informed me that his wife has accepted a job in Manchester so they are moving to Leeds. After complimenting Chris on his logic I called our new off spinner, who informed me he has actually signed for our local rivals as they are nearer to his house. This was not going well. At this point the phone was regarded as some sort of bad omen and I wrote all my available players down. Squad looks a touch unbalanced. I have 11 good batsman, 0 wk, 3 spinners and 2 seamers. We may have to bat 2nd a few times this year.

In times of crisis such as these I turn to Newcastle Uni. Our club is in an area where basically all the students live. Salvation was found in a seam bowling all rounder who loves Newcastle and wants to live here all summer.

Great news. Crisis over. I then learnt that a 1st XI seamer is injured, and my fresh new recruit is attracting envious glances from the 1st team. I'm now stuck trying to find the student a Saturday morning job so he can't play 1's. He looks about old enough for a paper round. I like having papers delivered. Could be a 2 birds 1 stone sort of scenario I think.

Having assembled a squad capable of challenging for mid table mediocrity I was then poleaxed by the news from the north that our friendly was cancelled for this weekend. The golf course is being lined up as a replacement. Lot of novice golfers in the side, may insist on some money in the pot to supplement income and expected phone expenditure for the coming season.

Our 1st XI captain arrived back from Australia yesterday, I am meeting him tonight to go over a few things. Aside from a few physical deformities (he has the longest arms in world cricket, he was actually injured last year when he tripped over his own hands) he is a pretty good bloke. Hopefully we can maintain a cordial working relationship. As I have given him the gift of a newly assembled first team while he has been away scratching his ankle (without bending down) in Perth you would hope he would be grateful.

We have also recently learnt that our off spinner has broken into the 1st class squad at Loughbrough. This is great news for him. However, it means availability for him may be an issue later in the season. This means I may have to abandon my loyal charges and go into the 1s as an emergency replacement. I have absolutely no interest in this whatsoever. Our first game of the season is against Durham Academy and their battery of quicks.

These young lads like bowling short and watching fat number 10s such as myself take fairly unimpressive evasive action. Tonights meeting with Niall will have a secondary objective that an all seam attack in late April is fine augmented by a part time spinner or two. Failing that, another trip to Justsport beckons to obtain yet more padding.

I hope everyone is looking forward to the season and from Newcastle CC I wish all clubs and players the best of luck for the Summer of 2011.

Follow Phil Hudson Newcastle CC 2nd X1 Skipper on twitter @lovetheturret